I have been praying for more patience in my personal life, and I have finally found the key to getting it.
As I have grown in the Word I have found that my patience is increasing. It is still not where I want it to be, but definitely better than it used to be.
My prayers aren’t necessarily for an increase in patience as they are for a decrease of Self. If I want to be a vessel that God can used, someone through whom He can work, it is imperative that me and my selfish human natures, desires and characteristics dwindle. Our biggest enemies as Christians are our own Selves. When we allow the desires of God to be replaced by our own wants and whims, we cannot be useful to Him.
It is safe to say that this world can definitely benefit from every single one of us who claims to be a Christian to shine our light a bit brighter in 2015. With each passing year we see more tragedy and moral decay than the year before it. We should all be asking God to fill us, to remove Us from the picture and help us to develop the character exhibited by our Master, Jesus the Christ.
I have made goals for 2015 and one of them is to find a way to despise my job less. The atmosphere has improved and I enjoy all of my co-workers. However, the work itself is not what I pictured myself doing upon attaining my Master’s degree, and if I let it, I can get depressed if I compare myself to worldly standards–two degrees, tons of student debt, with nothing to show for it. However, this year is about meeting goals, not just sitting back and complaining. I am looking for some type of second job that I can do with minimal impact on my family–maybe something working from home, or something that involves writing–and would like to be able to use the second income solely on paying down my student loan debt, because it is hindering my entire family. Other goals include getting my weight under control. My youngest child is almost three. There is no reason I should still be carrying all of that extra weight around.
In terms of my job, getting my mind right about that is difficult. In the past two weeks in particular, I have found the overall selfish attitude of many of the people I am supposed to help to be quite disconcerting. I understand people get anxious when they have a problem with their health, but that is no reason to completely disregard the needs of others–needs that may be more pressing than your own.
Not saying that one being bothered by the fact that their doctor gets behind and their appointment does not begin when it is scheduled–it is understandable. People have other things to do than sit in their doctor’s reception area all day. I get it. But how about considering that perhaps your doctor got behind because a life-threatening problem came up with another of their patients? Is it impossible to understand how a doctor can get behind, or how a prescription can take up to 24 hours to fill, as doctors and their staff are tending to the needs of hundreds of other people and not just you? Shouldn’t one take personal responsibility for failing to call before their meds run out completely; not providing us with their insurance information or making sure a service is covered with THEIR unique plan that THEY signed up for; or making sure they know the date and time of their own appointment, which THEY scheduled? Understandably everyone has an off day, but I have noticed a pattern in which people are faster to get angry and blame others (usually us hapless receptionists) for something we have no control over.
As a patient myself, I have rarely been to the doctor and got in an out quickly. In the reception area, I remind myself that there might be someone back there knocking on death’s door, and my sore throat is probably not going to kill me. I also remind myself that while it is okay to politely inquire about your wait time, the receptionist at the front desk has no control what goes on behind her. Now, one problem I have is with impatience in the car. I try to tell myself that if people are moving slowly, it gives me time to just enjoy the vehicle God has provided for me, and if there is a traffic backup, I think that perhaps there is an accident and I should just pray for their safety and health and thank God for my own.
In times where your patience is tested, think of others and the possibility that just maybe you are being hindered while another of God’s children is being cared for. In 2015, my goal is to focus more on others and less on self.